Who’s Name Comes First

Whos Name WithLove01

Who’s Name Comes First, the Bride’s or the Groom’s?

What is the etiquette surrounding who’s name goes first on all the wedding details? After pondering this with many brides-to-be I decided to post this question and share what we’ve seen in designing so many stickers for favors and welcome bags.   Typical protocol says that prior to the wedding day (on Save the Dates, Invitations, etc.) the bride’s name should precede the groom’s. And after the wedding day (on Thank You cards, Address Labels, etc.) that the groom’s name precedes his new wife. Ok, makes good enough sense…

But what about DURING the wedding weekend…  on Hotel Welcome Bags, Programs, Favors, Cocktail Napkins, etc?

We see couples usually choose one of Two Options:

  1. Stick with the protocol above and decide per item depending on whether the actual vows have been said.  So welcome bags at the hotel?  Not married yet, so go with bride’s name first.  Favors at the Wedding? You’re a “Mrs.” now so place the groom’s name first.
  2. The second choice is stick with Personal Preference. It seems the strict etiquette really applies mostly to the formal stationery, so for other items use your personal preference on what looks and ‘feels’ right to you.  Often times a couple is known to friends and family in a certain order and it feels funny to mix that up!
 At Sweet Sanity we typically see Welcome Bags using the Bride’s name first, and then favors at the wedding she is second!
What about Same Sex Weddings?
In the case of same sex weddings, we often see one of Two Options as well:
  1.  Let Alphabetical lead the way – this gives a nice structure to follow and helps define the order to be Jeff & John, as opposed to John & Jeff.
  2.  Much like above,  you can choose Personal Preference.   If you’ve become “Tina and Cathy” to your friends and family, it might feel odd to switch the order of your names just for the invites!  If it feels very unusual to say it in that order for you and your partner (and doesn’t even feel like you all!), it might be best to honor your relationship and refer to yourselves as you normally do.